A Girl's Got to Have Her Standards!

There was once a line in a movie that went something like, “A girl’s gotta have her standards”. Although this isn’t the most profound, or grammatically correct, statement anyone has ever spoken, it holds a lot of truth. A girl does have to have standards when choosing attire, friends, and, most importantly, a mate. I’d have to say one of the things I’m most picky about would be the guy(s) that I date. I turn down a lot more dates than I accept for three main, recurring reasons: 1) The guy who asks is too old, 2) The guy who asks is too immature, and 3) The guy who asks is simply not physically attractive to me. Keep in mind, I’m really not a shallow person, but just as that person in that certain movie said, “A girl’s gotta have her standards”! Guy Number One can be explained fairly easily. Since I’m 17, in order to be too old, he would be age 21 or older, which would make it not only very immoral, but very ILLEGAL for me to date him. Now that I’m in college, it seems that most of the guys who ask me out fall into this category. We’ll call this type of guy “Overaged Omar”. Now, Overaged Omar will usually have at least a little bit of facial hair, drive a “soupedup” coupe or a loud, HUGE truck on a lift with monstrous tired to make it even more huge. He usually has some sort of job, more than likely at the prison, jail or somewhere in Corpus Christi, and thinks I’m far older than I really am. Most of the time the date the guy is looking for consists of an overabundance of alcohol at either a local party or a club. When Overaged Omar finds out how old I am, he will, more than likely, do one of two things: 1) He’ll back away, FAR away and never return, or, 2) He’ll revert to “perverted old guy” mode and think of what a stud he’ll be if he can tell his buddies he got a date with someone half his age. Now, Overaged Omar isn’t always automatically tossed into the disposal because of the number of years he’s spent on this earth. Sometimes I’ll actually agree to ride around with them in their bassboosting cars and loud, rumbling trucks for a night, just to see what they’re all about. Overaged Omar’s chances of nabbing a date with the almighty, picky one? They can range anywhere from a 0 to a 5 out of 10. Now, we move on to Guy Number Two. (Is it just me, or is this beginning to sound like a bad episode of Love Connection?) Guy Number Two can be pretty much any age, look any way, drive any vehicle and wear any type of clothing. The only way you can pick out his type is to spend time with him and see how he acts. If he’s constantly making stupid jokes, emitting bodily gasses in public and laughing, smashing his face into glass doors or windows and making faces at the people on the other side, or doing anything else that remotely resembles the activities of a bored fiveyearold, you have Guy Number Two. We’ll call this one “Annoying AJ”. Annoying AJ comes in many forms. He can be a tall, blondehaired, blueeyed idiot, or a short, darkhaired, browneyed goofball. Sure, he can make you laugh and bring you out of any bad mood, but his problem is he doesn’t know when to STOP making his little jokes. Then, there’s the problem with his antics not always being so humorous. Passing gas while on a date is NOT exactly my idea of good humor. So will Annoying AJ ever get a date with me? There’s a 5 out of 10 chance that he will, mostly because I’m a sucker for any guy who can get a laugh out of me that’s genuine, and not a pity laugh. His chances of being dumped after the first date are even higher if he proceeds to “let himself go” a little too much. Finally, we have our final type, Guy Number Three. Guy Number Three may be smart, funny and have every other good attribute available to mankind, but if he’s not my type physically, a relationship with the two of us outside of friendship would not stand a chance. This guy will be “NotMyType Nathan”. No matter what a person says, in order to have a healthy loverelationship with someone, you MUST be at least a tad bit attracted to them physically. It’s not shallow to want someone tall and muscular like some people would have you believe, it is, in fact, very NORMAL. So if a short, scrawny guy with red hair, thick glasses and yellow teeth asked me for a date, I’d kindly decline and have to move on with my life… quickly. Would I be his friend? Sure! But there’s no way I could date anybody who I wasn’t physically attracted to. No way; no how; never going to happen. Call me vapid, shallow, whatever you’d like… but it’s just one of my many “rules of dating”. So what are “NotMyType Nathan’s” chances of a date? Let’s just say slim, VERY slim. Allinall, I suppose I could be a little more lenient on my prospective dates, but for now I guess I’ll continue on with my pickiness. Being so choosy hasn’t steered me wrong so far, considering that I’ve never really been on a date where I’ve had an absolutely unforgivably horrid time with a guy, but maybe I missed out on some great person by prejudging. Who knows… Yes, “a girl’s gotta have her standards”, but when does she learn where to draw the line? Overaged Omar, Annoying AJ and NotMyType Nathan may not be perfect, but then again, neither am I.