Warning Signs Of An Abusive Partner

Many of us don’t want to believe that we are involved with a person whom has the tendency to be abusive. Too often we get involved with a partner that starts out being the best thing we could have ever wanted and in the end they turn into something that we would never have thought imaginable. The problem with an abusive partner is that we can be so blinded by love that we often don’t see it for ourselves. Friends and family members are the ones that sit us down to tell us that your partner is abusive to some degree.

You may be thinking that he or she hasn’t done anything to me physically so I am not in an abusive relationship. Hitting, punching and bruising are a part of physical abuse. Not every person who is abusive resorts to physical abuse. Here are some warning signs that you can look out for. Ask yourself these questions and see if any of these apply to you. They may not be abuse in the sense of what you are thinking but they are simply warning signs of what could be next.

The first thing that you should ask yourself is, does your partner get jealous of things that you have in your life such as a good home, nice car, many friends including friends of the opposite sex. Sometimes when one partner has a more fulfilling life like more friends or parents who buy them things can often bring out jealousy in the partner who doesn’t have. Many times the jealous fades if the relationship is strong enough but often times it can be the start of something.

Does your partner often make the plans for you when you go out? For example, if you have plans with other friends on the same night that he or she wants to go out, do you have to change your plans in order to appease them? If you want to go see a new movie that has come out but he or she wants to see something different do you always have to give in and change? If this happens more often than you care to admit then it could be seen as a sign of control.

Has your boyfriend or girlfriend ever verbally talked down to you in front of family and friends on more than just a few occasions? This is also a sign of control and subordination. They want you to see that they have control and if it can lower your selfesteem then it is working. You may see this kind of behavior in some of the relationships around you. The idea is to see these warning signs in yourself, if so you have to find a way to break that cycle. Talk to your partner and express your feelings about the way they have been treating you.

If you are not sure what to say, talk to a school counselor and get advice. The idea is to get them to change before it gets worse or move on. If you choose to move on, you want to do it as civilly as you can. You don’t want to make the situation worse.